Growing up, I wanted nothing more than to be a part of something great. I dreamed about the day I could save someone's life, discover something new, change the world. So, like generations before me, I read fantasy and watched sci-fi. But the books and films weren't cathartic: experiencing them, becoming involved in their worlds, was physically painful. I wanted so much to do something important. And it never seemed like I did.
If you read my other blog, I'm sure you've picked up on my most recent sci-fi obsession: Doctor Who. It's a show about normal--painfully normal--people who take up 'traveling' with an alien genius who takes them through space and time to change history and save lives. His 'companions' come and go, individuals given the once-in-a-billion-lifetimes choice whether to see the universe with the Doctor on his ship, the TARDIS, or to stay safely at home. I can imagine myself, as a teenager, praying for that choice, praying that my life wouldn't be "normal."
The thing is, my life isn't normal. It's amazing. It's full of people who love me, a community of support and dependency. I'm not normal, either. I'm equipped to live an extraordinary life and, best of all, have a fiance ready and excited to share it with me. For the first time in my life, I think I would say "No" to the Doctor.
I know I go on and on about vocation, especially for someone too young to really know much about it. But my life with Adam seems so exciting, so full of promise. Teaching, writing, making love, making lunches, hosting crafternoons, singing musicals with friends--all these things, now, seem so important. My vocation isn't, I think, to change the world in a revolutionary way. But I hope it is to live a revolutionary life of happiness and simplicity. As bizarre, maybe even cowardly, as it seems to me to say this, I'll take that life with Adam over traveling with the Doctor any day.
You can read more about my minor Doctor Who obsession here and here.
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